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Wow, it's legal to sell anything that promises "cult control" on eBay. You can not sell body parts, but part selling mind control devices that turn ordinary people into cultists. Thats perfectly legal… well I think that it is clear that this polygamy persuasion tool is not exactly real. |
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This auction has ended
Selling Price: \$19.95 |
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Do you ever have the feeling that God is above you? This seller came home to find that God was literally above him or her. (don't tell the seller, but it looks like they have a leak in the ceiling!) Now, with the Christmas time just around the corner, they have decided to spread the God to everyone. Dunce actually has the real God in a bottle, anybody want to buy that? |
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This auction has been removed from eBay
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"2 m&m's in a bag" and "3 mystery items. autograghed. CELEBRITY ITEMS" That is the gist of the description (spelling mistakes and all). Now you see what I meant by that title? This auction was obviously created while the seller was in some drunken stupor. When Dunce is drunk, I don't usually list things on eBay. But, whatever floats your boat! |
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This auction has ended
Selling Price: $26.55 23 bids |
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Ugly baby, right? At least it’s a really cute dog though! What do you name a dog? Dunce the dog? Then again, do I really want my namesake to be a puppy? Or worse yet, do I really want little Dunce and that dog to share the same name? Imagine the therapy bills when my kid grows up and realized I named him after a dog. |
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This auction has ended
Selling Price: $56.55 27 bids |
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Do you love The eBay Song? Dunce sure does, it's practically my theme song. I love to listen to this Weird Al Yankovitch song while I'm searching for all the dumb auctions that make their way onto DumbAuctions.com. Besides it's really catchy and just plain fun to listen to… It sort of makes you appreciate how far our culture has fallen.
Haven't heard the song yet? We don't have the song to give to you, but here are the lyrics.
Yeah
A used … pink bathrobe
A rare … mint snowglobe
A Smurf … TV tray
I bought on eBay
My house … is filled with this crap
Shows up in bubble wrap
Most every day
What I bought on eBay
Tell me why (I need another pet rock)
Tell me why (I got that Alf alarm clock)
Tell me why (I bid on Shatner's old toupee)
They had it on eBay
I'll buy … your knick-knack
Just check … my feedback
"A++!" they all say
They love me on eBay
Gonna buy (a slightly-damaged golf bag)
Gonna buy (some Beanie Babies, new with tag)
(From some guy) I've never met in Norway
Found him on eBay
I am the type who is liable to snipe you
With two seconds left to go, whoa
Got Paypal or Visa, what erev'll please
As long as I've got the dough
I'll buy … your tchotchkes
Sell me … your watch, please
I'll buy (I'll buy, I'll buy, I'll buy …)
I'm highest bidder now
(Junk keeps arriving in the mail)
(From that worldwide garage sale) (Dukes Of Hazard ashtray)
(Hey! A Dukes Of Hazard ashtray)
Oh yeah … (I bought it on eBay)
Wanna buy (a PacMan Fever lunchbox)
Wanna buy (a case on vintage tube socks)
Wanna buy (a Kleenex used by Dr. Dre, Dr. Dre)
(Found it on eBay)
Wanna buy (that Farrah Fawcet poster)
(Pez dispensers and a toaster)
(Don't know why … the kind of stuff you'd throw away)
(I'll buy on eBay)
What I bought on eBay-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y